"And I don’t know what it means to be okay. Or to not be okay. I don’t know what to say when someone asks me how I am, because I simply don’t know how I am. Am I okay? Am I not okay? I don’t know what it means to be better, or worse. I don’t know what it means to be skinny or fat. I don’t know what it means to be normal or abnormal. A year ago everything was different and everything was safe. I didn’t eat and I lost weight. I lost weight almost everyday. I weighed myself everyday and I exercised everyday and everyday was the same. The same routine and the same feelings. I wanted to die and I wanted to die skinny. Now everything is mixed up. I want to live and I want to die. I want to eat and I want to starve. I want to stay in and I want to go out. I want to love and I want to hate. I want to laugh and I want to cry. I want to lose weight and I want to not care. I want, I want, I want. I don’t know what I want. I want everything. I want nothing. I’m confused and I hate it."

hollowsouls (via cravemypast)

(Source: dainty-tears)

2 months ago  Notes (11)
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